To Not Care
by Peppermint Smile
Summary: I thought such things happened because no one knew they happened...because everybody in the school didn’t see it. I was so innocent...first Chyan slash. PERMANENTLY UNFINISHED. Copyright 2007 Peppermint Smile


_I've discovered a new fun writing topic; "Chyan". The more I think about it, the more I love the idea. Chad is always seen as the gay-hater [I even placed him in that category, haha, but honestly, Troy has just as much of a chance to be homophobic as him. And Chad has far more pressure to live up to his captain's standards—Troy can truly set his own standards and others will follow, but it's different for Chad. Besides…Chad/Ryan are such complete opposites; it would make the cutest couple! ( :_

_I had to memorize Elie Wiesel's Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech for a World Literature test grade, and as I memorized all the words, I thought about what my teacher had said. I know we've all heard it ten thousand times, but the whole deal about learning from the past. Personally, like my dad, I'm a huge history nerd. I mean, heck, I watched about 20 hours worth [no exaggeration; probably more of info about World War II; and was utterly fascinated. Believe I'm a history nerd now? Back on subject, I thought about how Elie's speech was to warn the later generations of making the same mistake as the whole fiasco with Jews/"special need" people/Gypsies back in the 1940s. Why couldn't the same principle of discrimination and hatred apply to modern day high school? With problems we deal with every day?_

_I've wanted to do a fanfic on his speech ever since January, and finally got the right people/setting to work with it. The words in between quotation marks in bold font are experts from Elie's speech, and are mostly in the exact order he said them in, skipping a few parts [as a helping hint, the quote exerpt applies to the text below it. The first few paragraphs are just background, so they have no quote. I narrowed it down to the parts I felt most essential to get the point across. I hope you enjoy reading it ( : Be sure to __**R&R**__, as always; I do love reviews._

To Not Care

I idolized Troy Bolton as more than just a friend. He was a role model in every category; perfect basketball captain, perfect boyfriend with the perfect girlfriend, perfect best friend, perfect group leader, perfect actor, perfect singer; perfect everything. I wished to be like him in every respect—he was like the god of East High, and all of us were just disciples scribbling notes. That was before I forgot my jersey in the boy's locker room the day before Spring Break started.

It was the sounds I heard floating from the locker room that tipped me off. I began to slow down and peeked slowly around the grated wire substance separating the area from the hallway. What I saw took my breath away in one instant.

The entire basketball team had ganged up…against Ryan Evans.

And I here I was, believing that because of our experiences at the victory against West High that everything was cool between jocks and drama geeks. Yet in some way, I knew that it wasn't because of the guy's crazy hats or ridiculously nice shirts. This issue went far deeper…it was something _personal._

"Chad, my man!" Troy called out in greeting, and my heart sank down into my toes. _Troy Bolton_ was involved in this? My eyes slowly moved from my captain—my idol—to the pathetic figure crumpled in a miserable heap at my friends' feet…his arms raised protectively over his head in a feeble attempt to protect himself from the onslaught.

When Troy called my name, Ryan's head jerked up. His eyes suddenly widened, and he made an effort towards me, his eyes pleading—desperately begging—me to help him. With a sharp kick to his gut, Troy easily brushed aside the attempt.

"Chad, my man! I was wondering when you would come around." My stomach twisted itself into nasty knots as I saw a cocky, self-assured grin easily cover Troy's face while his cohorts aimed a few more punches at the defenseless Ryan's face.

"What's he done now?" I asked, hoping that I sounded like I did not care one way or the other.

"He's himself," Jason answered for him, a similar smirk covering his handsome face. "He's a queer, pathetic life form. Do we need another reason?"

_He's gay_. That was their answer. He was something that every one of them feared more than tornadoes, hurricanes, earthquakes, and wildfires put together. They were so afraid that their own feelings might prove to be so "unnatural" as Ryan's, so they took out their worry on him. The _manly basketball players_ took out their insecurity and doubt on a classmate too sweet, scared, and frail to fight back. Cowards. That is what my _fine colleagues_ were; cowards.

I had never been so ashamed to be associated with people in my entire life. But I didn't dare tell them so…I didn't dare.

I thought such things happened because no one knew they happened. I thought that the only way anything as terrible as that could occur would be because everybody in the school didn't see it. I was so innocent…and_ foolish_ enough to believe everything at face value.

"…**And then I explain to him how naïve we were, that the world did know and remained silent."**

I was _so_ certain that no one knew of the activities that took place in the locker room. Later, I told Taylor about it, expecting her to share my feelings about the matter. To my surprise, she only raised an eyebrow.

"You didn't know?" My eyes must have grown twice in size.

"What do you mean, 'I didn't know'?"

"I just would have thought you of all people would know about the bullying. Everybody **I **know knows about it. It's not like it hasn't been happening for ages"

If my eyes had grown bigger before, it was nothing to their size now. "People know about it?"

"Even _Coach Bolton_ knows about it"

"Then why doesn't somebody do something??"

She just shrugged. "It's not that dramatic. Why bother the principal about something that happens in every high school?"

"Do Gabriella, Kelsi, and Sharpay know?" I questioned softly, wondering how out of this world I had really become.

"They sure do"

"And…?"

"They don't do anything either. Don't trouble yourself, Chad; if Ryan's own twin doesn't think it's that big deal, why should you?"

My trust in and respect for East High Wildcats ended that day. It never returned.

"**And that is why I swore never to be silent whenever wherever human beings endure suffering and humiliation."**

"Feel like joining in?" Such a simple sentence Troy said that fateful afternoon, but it set off the beginning of a huge storm of thoughts inside my brain.

I couldn't force myself to answer. All I could do was stare at Ryan form lying at the mercy of guys twice his size and stature. I stared on in horror as I saw Zeke, laughing, kick Ryan's hat off of his head and crush the obviously-designer accessory underneath his heel. Ryan winced, and tried voicing his protest, but a nearby basketball player casually slugged him in the cheek.

"Keep your mouth shut, fag, or I'll have to do this," Jason chuckled, and with a swift movement of his hand ripped Ryan's pressed panted precisely in half. Yelping with embarrassment, Ryan's face matched the spanking-new red lockers as he hastily tried to cover himself; all those around him roaring with laughter.

My mouth would not function. I stood there, as talkative as a brick building, watching as Zeke proceeded to dump a can of bright green paint on top of the blonde's glistening hair and crisp shirt. They only laughed harder as the junior wiped the icky goopy from his sensitive eyes and mouth, and they took the opportunity of his distracted attention to yank his slacks completely off his body.

Our captain chuckled along with them at Ryan's disgrace, and turned to me again. My silence had not gone unnoticed after all.

"Well, are you going to help or not?" A playful smile still remained firmly on his face as Ryan frantically endeavored to reclaim his vital article of clothing. Troy and the others waited patiently for my answer..._Ryan_ waited for my answer.

"**We must take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim." **

"This is you guys' business…do what you want. I don't want to be involved; I don't care"

Troy shrugged his shoulders. "Suit yourself." But my eyes were resting on Ryan's expression. For one moment, he had believed he might still have a chance of escaping that nightmare. But it had been shattered…**I **had shattered it. The second I turned my back to leave, I heard a loud outcry, followed by a snort of laughter. I recognized it as a sign that the basketball captain had pummeled the drama king in the stomach once again.

I walked away from the locker rooms, sure that I was doing the right thing. The moment my feet hit the tile floors of the hallway, however, all such assuredness fully left me.

It wasn't _me_ who was beating Ryan Evans into a pulp in East High locker rooms; _I_ wasn't the one ruining his clothing and painting his face. So why did I feel just as terrible as if I had? Why did I feel like I was just as guilty as the basketball star I had hailed as a god…and with him the teenagers I had considered respectable and fair? Why did I feel so corrupt and unclean?

"**Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented." **

I tried not to think about it. I made out with Taylor in the back of a movie theatre and almost got dead-drunk at Troy's seventeenth birthday party. I found the key to my parent's beer cabinet and went on several buzzes. I went on a joyride in some college kid's car with my basketball buds and flirted shamelessly with waitresses at a bar we had only accessed with fake IDs.

But no matter what I did, I could not get the picture of Ryan's beseeching, angelic blue eyes. They bore into my head every kiss I planted on Taylor's hot lips and screamed in my ear for every ache I receive the morning after the booze party.

I couldn't stand to look at Ryan straight in the face anymore. I avoided him in the hallway at all costs, and only talked to him if it was required. Every person I saw walking the hallways I did not trust, for there was the huge possibility that they also knew about Ryan's hours of grief. If they did, then the laughter from the locker rooms after school was sure proof that they had not acted upon their feelings either.

My captain and my friends did not make it any easier for me to ignore the situation. In my hearing range they would discuss cheerfully what next to do to their easy victim, and arrange who would bring the necessary materials if any were required. I would only bury my head further into my homework, closing my ears and mind; refusing to hear what I was hearing. Perhaps if I just pretended to know nothing about it and not say anything about it, it would just go away like a bad cold. Do not touch it and it will go away.

"**Sometimes we must interfere…when human dignity is in jeopardy, national borders and sensitivities become irrelevant."**

Troy would continually ask me if I wanted to come put my two-cents into their fun, and I would continually refuse on the protest that I didn't care. I never told them that what they were doing was terrible; it wasn't my place to do so. Someone who did not have to worry about losing their place in society or losing their best friend and idol could tell them it was wrong to bully a gay teenager.

Soon enough, however, I saw that I was not going to be able to stand it any longer. About a month after I first walked into the locker room, when the basketball team was having a study group, I finally spoke my mind.

"Hey, Troy?" He briefly glanced up from his Calculus notes.

"What"

"I was thinking…about the whole Ryan thing…" I had gotten everyone's attention. Troy turned his attention away from the confusing scribbles and gave me his full attention. "Don't you think that you guys are kind of going overboard with the whole thing? I mean, he can't help the way he feels. If he is into guys, that's his deal, not ours. Why can't we just leave him alone?"

You would think I had suggested closing the basketball season forever. "What do you mean, _just leave him alone_?" Jason demanded, his eyes narrowing. "You don't think it's funny how pathetic his is? Can't you see what an easy target he is? It's like bullying your baby sister; what can she do to you?"

"I'm not saying we _can't_ beat up Ryan, I just…err…" It was a lot harder to say this underneath their stares. "I just don't know if I agree that we _should_"

Startling us all, Troy laughed. Instead of me laughing along, I felt my gut sink seven feet. "Chad, Chad, Chad. You really crack me up sometimes, man. Here we are, just beating up a fag—" I winced, "—and you go on about the _principal _of the thing…like we were in debate or something." He kept on chuckling and a few other players weakly mimicked the action. "Don't make it such a big deal. Just forget about it; you don't have to help us. If it's not your thing, don't sweat it; it's not that big a deal"

"**Whenever man and women are persecuted because of their race, religion or political views, that place must—at that moment—become the center of the universe…"**

_It's not that big a deal_. First Taylor and now Troy had said those words. But they just didn't get it. The problem was it **was** a big deal! It did matter what went on every Friday in that locker room. What they did reflected how honest the rest of East High was, for crying out loud. It wasn't just about Ryan's bruises, now. It was about how everybody reacted to the ordeal. Sharpay glowered at everybody as she always did, leaving her twin brother—who bore a bold black eye—to follow. Gabriella made all A's on her project for Chemistry, never glancing twice at her silent lab partner with painted lime green hair who hadn't been able to make one third of their planned meetings. Troy, Jason, Zeke, and all the basketball players chattered freely with drama students, both parties knowing and ignoring the fact that one of their peers was hurting.

If East High cared so little about a gay teenager being beaten up every Friday, would they care as adults if the Klu Klux Klan was allowed full power again? If East High only snickered when Ryan opened his locker and got an overflowing bag of glitter dumped on his head, would they only snicker at the fall of immigrants' rights?

The problem with East High was that this _was_ a big deal, and a few gentle words to my best friend just weren't going to cut it.

"…**And action is the only remedy to indifference, the most insidious danger of all…"**

Palms sweating and perspiration dripping down my arms, I stepped into the locker room. "Leave him alone!"

Twelve pairs of eyes stared blankly at me. "_What did you say_?" Troy asked incredulously.

"You heard me," I said, hoping to God my voice sounded more confident than I felt. "Leave Ryan alone! He's never done anything to you, so just bug off!"

"Chad…what do you think you are doing?" Jason asked stupidly. Ryan was still gaping at me, as if his ears were deceiving him. "This _thing_ is a faggot—"

"—Who's also terrific a drama!" I exploded. "Zeke is a basketball player and bakes really good cookies! Troy is a basketball captain and is a terrific singer! Ryan is an amazing actor who is also homosexual! Why is that such a big problem?? Why can't you just **move on** with your stinking lives and get over the fact! Don't be _cowards_…" Oh god, had I _really_ just said that? "Just grow up, for once in your life, and leave the poor guy alone." I offered a hand to Ryan, who slowly took it. I helped him stand up; he was kind of shaky and had to clutch my arm for support, breathing heavily and clutching his bleeding chest.

"_What are you doing_?" Jason asked again, lacking something more intelligent to say.

"I'm choosing sides," I answered harshly. "I'm sick and tired of this bullshit about not caring and not having to pick a side. I've chosen mine…and I'm sticking with it"

Putting my head underneath Ryan's right arm, I helped him limp out of the locker room; his right leg wasn't very stable. "Chad, wait, come back; let's talk about this!" Troy called after me. "You can't _seriously_ mean what you just said…"

For once in my life, I glared at my idol, and told him something I never had before. "Shut up, Troy. Just shut up." With that dramatic last line, Ryan and I exited the locker hallway and hobbled over to the nurse's office.

"**There is so much to be done, there is so much that can be done…"**

"What did you do that for?" Ryan finally croaked out while the nurse went to find an ace bandage for his ankle, which was turning the same lovely shade of purple as his eye. His ripped shirt lay on a nearby table, his now-revealed bruises scattered across his chest covered in some form of medicine.

"What do you mean?" I asked, realizing I had never truly talked to the guy before.

"Why did you yell at Troy? Everybody knows how much you look up to him…what made you talk back to him?"

I thought for a long time about his question. When I finally figured it out, I smiled up at the frail blonde dancer.

"You know when I first saw it, that Friday before Spring Break?" He nodded. "You just looked so helpless, like you really, _really_ needed **my** help…and when I said that I didn't care, you just stared hard at me…and I couldn't get that image out of my head. You wouldn't let me forget you, and the only way I could get you out of my head was to help you, I suppose"

"And now?" he asked softly. I looked into his innocent eyes. They were curiously studying my own brown ones. The corners of my mouth twitched, and I could feel another smile coming on.

"Now I know that I'll never be able to get you out of my mind, Ryan. I finally settled the mental side of things…but I still have my feelings to deal with. You know what I'm saying?"

Something I hadn't seen happen in months happened…Ryan smiled. A real, true, glowing Ryan-smile. "I know what you're saying"

"**Our lives no longer belong to us alone; they belong to all those who need us desperately."**

From that day on, it wasn't about me anymore; it was all about Ryan. Taylor and I had never been official, and never became official. I spent more and more of every day with Ryan, making sure his old nemeses kept their distance. I wanted _nothing_ to happen to him…all I wanted to do was protect his small frame against the bulky bullies of East High. I reveled in his innocent smile and sparkling eyes…and most of all in the fact of that he **needed** me. And I reveled in the knowledge that I needed him just as badly. It was wonderful to depend on someone so much, and have them depend on you.

Ever since that final Friday of Ryan's nightmare, I knew that all of me—my entire life—belonged entirely to Ryan Evans.

_I just realized that this is really my first fanfic that doesn't involve romantic feelings. I mean, it has all little Chyan, but it's more about the whole principal of the thing, for a change. I thought it was going to be more about Chad's feelings towards Ryan, but it just didn't turn out that way. What can I say; my stories have a mind of their own._

_If you're wondering how _real _the whole paint-dumped-on-Ryan's-head thing is, I know a kid who had that happen to him. It took him centuries to get the nasty stuff out of his hair, and same thing goes for the glitter in the locker. The oldest and worst prank you can play on someone you don't like; that stuff is __hell__ to get off._

_I wrote this at about midnight while listening to _"Face Down"_, the acoustic version, by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus [I might do I songfic to that later; thinking of the acoustic version. I really do love the acoustic version of that song; if you haven't listened to it, I highly encourage it. I've gone to sleep listening to it these last few nights, haha. Just the simplicity of the strumming guitar, sad sound, and male voice inspired me to write this._

_But back on subject [I am so bad about that kind of thing, as you can plainly see, what did you think? Be brutal, please—but not cruel, haha. I am actually quite proud of myself, this being the first time writing a Chad/Ryan story as well as my first time writing a fanfic based around a quote. Do you think the ending was too fast again? It's kind of short, but then that promises that Ryan and Chad have so much more in store for each other. __**Tell me what you thought in a nice loooonnggg review!**__ Thanks! _


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